Please note: Jan is currently scheduling counseling clients from a waiting list. When contacting her, please indicate your desire to be put on the waiting list, and you will be contacted as soon as possible.
What is your story?
How do you want to tell it,
and to whom?
There's a lot of counseling out there. If I can say it this way, I am sorry. It is difficult to know where to start. You probably have a sense that much happens in the name of counseling that is simply… unhelpful. And definitely not transformational. So, kudos to you for doing your homework. I hope this website can give you a sense of my background, heart and experience, and what the goal would be on my end.
Looking deeper at your life can be frightening, even when you find the right counselor. You can predict that you'll wonder what good it will do. But even your cynicsm can't quiet your deeper hope: Can I change and heal? Can I be free of this pain, anger, hurt, addiction, struggle? Flannery O'Conner says, "Grace changes us, and change is painful." It’s not what you thought. There really is more life and freedom for you. And you really are more loving and passionate than what you have become.
Specializing in Women's Issues
I specialize in helping women who have buried or deadened their hearts due to past trauma or sexual harm, addiction, relationship shame, depression or simply a slow, chronic loss of heart. The chief goal of our work is for you to be restored – to connect with your heart (the wellspring of all life), and to learn the joy of extravagant loving. Because we as women are good at conversation, we can fool ourselves into thinking that our hearts are more free, healthy and mature than they really are. Counseling will ask you to come out of hiding – to allow your false ways (addictions, control, manipulation, fear) to fall away so your heart can be tended to, cared for in the ways you have desired. You were designed to enjoy the pleasure of inviting others in, allowing them to enjoy you, to celebrate life. You’ve experienced countless things which have instructed your heart that it is foolish to live that way. As I wrote in The Allure of Hope, "We are far more disciplined than we are at rest, far more committed than winsome, far more 'nice' than passionate, far more dutiful than free. Far more weary than filled with hope.
I get it. I know how scary it can be to risk hoping ~wondering if your hard heart will ever thaw or be released. Your trembling is beautiful. There is life for you.
and... Specializing in Marriage Counseling
Nothing is war, like marriage. Most marriages settle in to either a de-militarized zone or a comfortable detante’, rather than remembering that you and your spouse were meant to be allies. There are plenty of counseling resources which will provide you with strategies, techniques, but if you are desire a transformation in your marriage, it will take both time and courage. If you are willing, it can be a refreshing reminder of what marriage really is:a humbling, comical, pleasurable crucible, as you grow into the image of God, and learn to find your life in God’s love.
You can keep ‘trying harder’ to love your spouse and 'work on' your marriage, or you can find restoration for your own heart, and a vision for bringing that heart to your spouse. I love marriage counseling. I love fighting for my own marriage, and I will enjoy helping you fight for your own.
"Where are You?"
G. K. Chesterton says, "Even a man at the doorstep of a brothel is looking for God." Whatever your brand of struggle, your heart is stirring. If you take some time to listen to it, to honor it, rather than giving way to shame, you might find that underneath all else is a holy longing. Come out of hiding. There is more for you.